How to Help Your Loved One with Arthritis

Nobody wants to live with pain, but unfortunately, that is the reality for many adults with arthritis. According to a 2023 study, more than 53.2 million adults in the United States have been diagnosed with the disease¹.

Nothing is worse than seeing your loved one in pain. You might feel helpless because you cannot stop their physical pain, but there are other ways you can help. Once you understand the specifics of their diagnosis, including what they need, there are many things you can do to assist a loved one dealing with arthritis pain.

Arthritis is not just one disease but encompasses many different diagnoses that cause swelling, inflammation, and tenderness in joints². Here are a few of the common types of arthritis your loved one may experience:

• Osteoarthritis – A degenerative joint disease that is a common type of arthritis in older adults.
• Autoimmune Inflammatory Arthritis – This encompasses several different diagnoses, including psoriatic arthritis, rheumatoid arthritis, and gout.
• Infectious Arthritis – Caused by a bacterial, viral, or fungal infection³.

Researching the specific type of arthritis your loved one is diagnosed with will help you better understand the ways you can help. Each type of arthritis has different causes and symptoms which will impact what you need to do as a caregiver.

Before making any caregiving plans, make sure you understand what your loved one needs. Instead of diving in, it’s key to talk to your loved one first. They have the clearest understanding of their health and needs.

Questions to ask:

• What do you need help with?
• Are there any chores that are difficult?
• How can I help you stay active?
• Do you still feel comfortable driving?
• Are there any home repairs I can help with?

Outlining a plan with your loved one allows them to have more agency and control over their life. An open and honest dialogue will help you discover both what they want to continue doing and any unexpected ways you can help.

Dealing with discomfort and pain is one of the most difficult parts of an arthritis diagnosis.  In addition to medicine, lifestyle changes may help your loved one manage their arthritis. 

• Maintain a healthy weight – More weight means more pressure on your joints, so it’s important to discuss what a healthy weight looks like with your care team.
• Stay active – Choosing the right exercise is important. When done correctly, exercise can help strengthen your muscles and reduce joint stiffness.
• Use heat and cold treatment – Heat and cold treatments can offer some relief when your loved one is in pain.
• Medication – Work with your loved one’s doctor to determine the best medicine for their symptoms.

Read more about easing and managing arthritis pain.

Offering transportation is one of the biggest ways you can help your loved ones as they age. There may be several reasons they no longer feel comfortable driving including eyesight, reflexes, or discomfort. If you’re able to help your loved one attend doctor appointments, the grocery store, and even social events, you can help them live a more fulfilling and active life even if they’re facing medical challenges.

If you are unable to drive, many health plans include transportation. Additionally, there are organizations that help with transportation for seniors including www.transit.dot.gov, www.eldercare.acl.gov, and  www.211.org

It’s important to make sure your loved one’s home is safe, especially if they’re having increased mobility issues.  Many homes need small adjustments, including cleaning up clutter and creating wider pathways. Some homes may require larger projects, such as adding grab bars to the bathroom or building a wheelchair ramp. Use the Home Safety Checklist from the National Institute on Aging to perform a home safety check. Do your research and learn how to adapt their home to help prevent falls.

Your loved one may no longer be able to do certain chores. Make a list of all the daily, weekly, and monthly chores their household requires. Some tasks, like mowing the lawn or walking the dog, may no longer be possible. See where you can help and where you may need to hire additional help.

Staying mobile is vital when your loved one has arthritis. It’s important to choose the right type of exercise. Avoid any high-impact and repetitive exercises such as running, jumping, or specific types of aerobics⁴.

Instead, choose low-impact exercises. Walking, cycling, water exercises, and exercises that focus on stretching or range of motion are better for people with arthritis. In addition to being good exercise, walking is good for your mental health⁵.  Learn more about walking for mental and physical health.

Before introducing a new exercise program make sure you clear it with your loved one’s doctor.

Being there emotionally for your loved one with arthritis is important. Arthritis pain can impact both mood and mental health. Pain is discouraging and your loved one needs support. Listen and never minimize their pain, even if it’s not visible to you. Saying things like “Look on the bright side” or “It’s not that bad” might sound encouraging but could discount their experience.

Use a balance of empathy and positivity to guide your conversations especially if they’re discussing their pain level. Pain is deeply personal, and some people are reluctant to discuss what they’re feeling.

Finding a support group for your loved one might help them connect with other arthritis patients who understand what they’re going through. Visit the Arthritis Foundation to find groups based on location and specific topics.

Sometimes it might be easier for you to do something yourself but that doesn’t mean you should. It’s important to allow your loved one to maintain their independence. Arthritis might slow them down, but that doesn’t mean they cannot do things for themselves. The support you provide allows them to continue to live their fullest life but should not prevent them from doing the things they still can.

Talk to your loved one about what they need help with. You can offer suggestions, but remember ultimately it’s their choice. Help where you’re wanted but try not to make assumptions. If they decide they need more assistance later on, they’ll let you know.

Being a caregiver for someone with arthritis is an important job. Whether it’s helping them stay active or offering emotional support, you’re doing valuable work to help them live a healthier and happier life.